I think everyone wants some form of this. The ways we go about it are as diverse as the number of people on the planet. There are some universal principles that apply to all people around the world. The ego, self worth, suffering, motivation, and desires all have a part to play.
The most important thing that needs to happen before you read what I have to say is identify a relationship. You have relationships all around you. There is no need for it to be a romantic relationship for you to work on it. All relationships matter and can be improved. The relationship is the bowl or cone you will build upon. It is the empty vessel of desire that craves to be filled.
Before any relationship can be improved it has to have room in the vessel.
When you build a sundae with someone it is important to share what you are putting in it together. There are many flavors you can add, and even give it different textures. Here are a few different ingredients you should be aware of.
Cherries - These are the little things that stick out in a relationship. They can complete the whole package. These include personal close, romantic, or intimate moments.
Ice Cream - This makes up the majority of your sundae. It is the everyday feeling you get with the person. It is best served smooth, but some do like a little nuts in theirs. Whether you like it smooth or nutty this is one of the most important ingredients.
Chocolate - This is the brown stuff that fulfills your sexual desire. Chocolate is passion. Passion can be dangerous to add in large quantities and could lead to you mindlessly putting some shit in your sundae as it is very similar in color.
Shit - Very similar to passion and often placed in the sundae by mistake in the absentmindedness and desire that chocolate creates. Jealousy, suspicion, anger, and hurt are all shit. They can take over the entire flavor of your sundae so please keep the poo out.
Pineapple preserves - These provide as much sweetness as texture. There are many such toppings you can put on your sundae that add both flavor and texture. These are your adventures, vacations, and history with someone.
Bowl - The bowl is the vessel that holds your relationship. It is your heart. It starts off empty but must be handled with care. It is fragile and the more sundae you build into it the more you risk. You must not fear dropping your bowl. Handle it like it is precious to you as it will always belong to you.
Unfortunately most people only worry about the status of a relationship when there is a turd in it. The thing about shit is that when you put it in your ice cream sundae it really messes up the whole flavor. The cherries even lose their desire after awhile. When there is a turd in your sundae there has to still be desire for the sundae in order to fix it. When you have a cup of turds there is no point going to therapy to remove them because without any ice cream to add you will just be left with a dirty bowl.